*sigh*

It's a cloudy morning here... Last night was soo good.... but today I just really miss you... Yep that would be you. So much. I know that I am supposed to be here and the Lord is doing unflippinbelievable work in my life... But oh how I wish I could share it more personally... And what do I do in these moments? It's okay to be sad and miss you right! Yes... And then what... fill up with people here? Fill up with Jesus... go for a walk? *sigh* I know the sun will come out later today...

On a side note, I have been learning so much... even personally outside of church and the women's conference... The other day I read chatper 3 of Waking the Dead... (If you haven't read it, omigoodness - get it!) And realized that this process I am walking through - in learning and testing this "experience at Newsong" is strengthening my heart. Strengthening where my heart ponders and thinks and mulls over... I realize that often my heart is the source of deep feelings and senses and emotions... Sometimes those emotions speak to loudly (for they are the language of the heart) before I allow it to really think... I want to be like Mary and really ponder things in my heart... "But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart." I want a treasure box of thoughts and questions... Anyway, I have started really journaling and digging in my bible - just questioning and wanting more - of what I have been learning here at Newsong... Despite their dislike of "Traditions" there seem to be several, "normal processes" and "experiences" that I want to know more about... You know - nothing strange but just things I'm not used to...

*sigh* How come people are SOOO busy so much? Rarely time to listen... I miss that so much. Conversation. ): Anyway, that's all...

till another time again...