You don't have to hide...

So, I popped in Joy William's cd, Genesis, on the way to work today... It felt like each one of the songs was a beckoning from Jesus to receive his love. To drown in his pool of grace.

I am sure you've heard her song, "Hide", but if you haven't, let me share with you the lyrics.

To anyone who hides behind a smile
To anyone who holds their pain inside
To anyone who thinks they're not good enough
To anyone who feels unworthy of love
To anyone who ever closed the door
Closed their eyes and locked themselves away

You don't have to hide
You don't have to hide anymore
You don't have to face this on your own
You don't have to hide anymore

So come out, come out, come out wherever you are
To anyone who's tryin' to cover up their scars
To anyone who's ever made a big mistake
We've all been there, so don't be ashamed
Come out, come out and join the rest of us
You've been alone for way too long

And if you feel like no one understands
Come to the One with scars on His hands
'Cause He knows where you are, where you've been
His scars will heal you if you let Him

It reminds me of the song, "Dirty Little Secret" by the All American Rejects... I wish I could share this song to each one of them who is hiding... Perhaps, you too have a "secret" - something that lays heavy on your heart each day - or perhaps a nasty monkey on your back - that just won't come down... I remember days of secrets. Even today - the shadow of shame, fear and condemnation may visit me... But Jesus calls out to you - "Come out! Let me heal your heart, your wounds - I have a new and beautiful life for you." Or perhaps another song by Joy Williams speaks his voice as well...

I saw you today
My familiar stranger
Everything's changed
You have come so far
You're different now
Would you go back, would you want to anyhow

Say goodbye, say goodbye
To the you I knew before
Say hello, say hello to a new beginning
Say goodbye, say goodbye
To the you I knew before
This is your genesis

Face to face
The present and past collide
And it's no mistake
I see the future is in your eyes
You seem so free
Like nothing's ever gonna keep you down

You're different now
You're different somehow
You're different now

Say goodbye, say goodbye

On another note, I have been meaning to write about something... After coming home from my trip to California - I was talking to my friend Julie... She has such wisdom and encouragement - Anyway, she reminded me to "Not forget where I ahve been - and remember what it was like before my eyes were open - Open to TRUE freedom in Christ, open to restoration..." And I realized how quickly I had forgotten my bondage - forgotten my desperation, forgotten my loneliness, forgot the nights of such intense tension in my spirit, forgot the pain, the tears... Why is that? Maybe because I don't necessarly want to remember... Some memories aren't very fun... But I realized there is another part of me that has a hard time just being rescued by my King... It is so difficult for me to be weak... to be vulnerable and in need... In need of a Saviour, in need of Grace, in need of wisdom, encouragement... One of my good friends and her husband and I went out for dinner a couple months ago and they were talking about me being rescued... walking in HOPE for a new day - The husband reminded me of John Eldredge's books - where he talks about women's longing to be rescued... Jesus wants to rescue me. A man (someday) will want to rescue me. Oh Jesus, I want to be rescued - in the depths of my heart, I want to be rescued... To be known, cherished - I want to flee from my striving, from busyness, from my fear... Oh Jesus, transform my heart... To rest in my weakness.

"Oh the joys of those who are kind to the poor! The Lord rescues them when they are in trouble. The Lord protects them and keeps them alive. He gives them prosperity in the land and rescues them from their enemies. The Lord nurses them when they are sick and restores them to health..." Psalm 41.

Rescue is Coming, David Crowder Band
There's a darkness in my skin
My cover's wearing thin, I believe
I'd love to start again, go back to innocent
And never leave

Don't give up now
A break in the clouds
We could be found
There's nothing wrong with me
It's just that I believe things could get better
And there's nothing wrong with love
I think it's just enough to believe

Rescue is coming
Rescue is coming
Rescue is coming
Rescue is coming

And there's nothing wrong with you
And nothing left to do
But believe something bigger
And there's nothing wrong with love
I know it's just enough to believe

Don't give up now
A break in the clouds
We will be found
Rescue is coming now

I feel like I've been met with this idea of Rescue in so many places... David Crowder writes about it a lot in his book, Sunsets and Sushi... And I've also found it in Donald Miller's book, Blue Like Jazz... Which you should read!

Here's an excerpt from one of the MANY good parts...

There is something quite beautiful about the Grand Canyon at night. There is something beautiful about a billion stars heald steady by a God who knows what He is doing. (They hang there, the stars, like notes on a page of music, free-form verse, silent mysteries swirling in the blue like jazz.) And as I lay there, it occurred to me that God is up there somewhere. Of course, I had always known He was, but this time I felt it, I realized it,k the way a person realizes they are hungry or thirsty. The knowledge of God seeped out of my brain and into my heart. I imagined him looking down on this earth, half angry because His beloved mankind had cheated on Him, had committed adultery, and yet hopelessly in love with her, drunk with love for her.

I know a little of why there is blood in my body, pumping life into my limbs and thought into my brain. I am wanted by God. He is wanting to preserve me, to guide me through the darkness of the shadow of death, up into the highlands of His presence and afterlife. I understand that I am temporary, in this shell of a thing on this dirt of an earth. I am being tempted by Satan, we are all being tempted by Satan, but I am preserved to tell those who do not know about our Savior and our Redeemer. This is why Paul had no questions. This is why he could be beaton one day, imprisoned the next, and released only to be beaten again and again and never ask God why. He understood the earth was fallen. He understood the rules of Rome could not save mankind, that mankind could not save itself, rather it must be rescued, and he knew that he wat not in the promised land, but still in the desert, and like Joshua and Caleb he was shouting, "Follow me and trust God!"

I see it now. I see that God was reaching out to Penny in the dorm room in France, and I see that the racism Laura and I talked about grows from the anarchy seed, the seed of the evil one. I could see Satan lashing out on the earth like a madman, setting tribes against each other in Rwanda, and whispering in mens ears in the Congo so that they rape rather than defend their women. Satan is at work in the cults of the Third World, the economic chaos in Argentina, and the corporate-driven greed of American corporate executives.

I lay there under the stars and thought of what a great responsibility it is to be human. I am human because God made me. I experience suffering and temptation because mankind chose to follow Satan. God is reaching out to me to rescue me. I am learning to trust Him, learning to live by His precepts that I might be preserved.

Alright... hope you are well and blessed!